So hard!!

Art by Jover

It is so hard trying to finalize one part of my life while starting a new part and not go insane or keep things level where my family is concerned.

I want my life to smoothly move from one to the other without going on a roller coaster ride doing so. Is that such a big request?

I want my new life with my wonderful Daddy to start out surrounded by calm, love and joy. Why is that have to be something so hard to accomplish??


At that point…

Do you ever find yourself feeling like you will never get where you want to go, be who you want to be, do what you want to do? Like the world just keeps throwing obstacles in your path to make things more difficult, frustrating and feeling defeated?

I am at the point I just want to throw up my hands and say I quit and run away!

I was raised to think of others, to make others happy and to do the right thing. I am trying to do all that and finally do all that for me too! It’s my turn to think of me, to be happy, to do the right thing for me! Yet trying to do that is sooo hard!! Ugh! I want to scream!!

Thanks so much anxiety, guilt, feeling responsible and fear; along with the biggest frustration ever! Go away and leave me alone! I need strength to get through all this🙈🙏

Okay…done venting now and getting that off my chest and out of my head.

Thank you💋

LD Playdate

IMG_2394Daddy and I have a playdate planned for this afternoon/evening.  I am to wear my  costume of choice and all the fixings.  There will of course be spankings involved and then toy play.

My thoughts are all over the place in wondering what Daddy will do and what he will have me do.  Maybe have me wear my butt gem while we play, and/or nipple clams.  Maybe use the wand or one of the other wonderful fun toys that we enjoy.  One, or many, possibly.  Sometimes he tells me a few hours prior to either put in my Kegel balls or my butt gem, which really get me keened up for play.  All I know is the sound of his voice and his guidance in the play is what gets me excited the most.

Having an extremely over-active imagination is a benefit to us both when we play long distance.  It is nothing in comparison to being in the same physical space, but knowing we will eventually get there, and get there for good soon, keeps us determined and eager to make it work. And believe it or not, our playdates keep us connected and centered with each other.

I am a blessed kitten baby girl to have a Daddy Dom that loves me as he does.

Kitty Kat

I believe


I believe in so many things. I believe I was put here for many reasons and am just getting started with understanding. I believe you can love more than one person in a lifetime. I believe there is a God.  I believe there are also other spirits and beings in the universe and world.  I believe there are other gods out there being followed and believed in that I do not know.  We all have been brought up in different family beliefs and religions, or non-religions, and we are all special in our own way.  Some of us are spiritual beings. Some of us are empathetic. Some of us are just very sensitive to our surroundings and those that fill those surroundings.  Some of us are self-focused and so do not pay attention to our surroundings.  Some of us have learned to count on others while some have learned to only count on ourselves.  Some of us realize we have been living one way when all along we have a purpose to live another way, and maybe in another place.

My point here is that we all have a purpose. We all are learning more and more of ourselves, others, and life every day.  There is good and bad in this world.  We learn to deal with things the best way we can, especially when we learn there are such things as boundaries and they are put in place for our happiness and ability to live and deal with things more appropriately.  We learn our talents and special gifts to use and enjoy.  We find the people we can share these things with.

My ultimate belief is that no matter what, there is always something to be happy about, always something to feel good about, always something to bring us up instead of holding us down.  Yes, there are times when we feel at our worst, like nothing will make us happy again, like only bad things happen to us; but there is ALWAYS a light at the other end.  It may not last long, and there may be several times to get there, but it is there and you will get there.  I have many many times and know of others that have as well.  It is life and there are always challenges and things to work through.  I believe we go through things for a reason. We may not know when going through these things what it is at the time, but there is always a reason.

I know, I’m sounding all philosophical, but I am really not.  I just pay a lot of attention to life, what others go through or are going through, as well as myself and those I am near and love.

Thank you, to those taking the time to read this, for letting me share my always moving thoughts with you this morning.  I had to put them down and get them out of my head. 😉

Kitty Kat

A few moments in time mean so much…What do you do to make your significant one feel loved?

IMG_1670When Daddy messages me or makes a quick call in to see how his Kitten is doing and how her day is going, makes me feel so special.  We never go a day without talking or messaging throughout the day to constantly stay in touch and communicate. It is such an important part of any relationship, especially when so far apart.  It means so much because it shows we care for one another, want what we have to last and that it is important to us both.

The little things we do and say to and for each other mean so much.

What do you do to make the one you love feel important, loved and that they mean so much?